My Choice
by TwilightKitsune1
Summary: first part to For That I Hate You... The summary is inside. character death. I personally enjoyed writing this, hope you like it to! R&R!--- Has slight slash, if you do not like male/male please don't read. ---


**Disclaimer: **I do not own Harry Potter or any characters from J.K. Rowling's books.

**Summary: **it was all he could do… He had to save them, had to save them all. He wanted to save _him_. Even though it was a costly cost to save them, to save _him_, he had to give it up. He never thought he would willingly give it up just to save him of all people. Yet he did, and as the last words he would ever speak left his mouth, he had no regrets for what he did. For them, for all the people that could live in peace, and for _him_, he decided. Death didn't seem that scary anymore.

My Choice…

By: TwilightKitsune1

Night seemed to have fallen on the world quicker then it usually did. Plans were being made and a fight was going to be fought. Not tonight though, tonight would be a night for those that are going to fight in the next battle to rest and recover their strength that would be needed and to say their goodbye to those that they may never see again after this night.

Yet there was a small party at number twelve, Grimmauld Place. It was mostly of the older generation yet there were a few young people in this party. They were celebrating a victory that all hoped to celebrate together again tomorrow. A hope that seemed to weigh heavily upon their hearts. A prophecy was all they had to go for. A hope that only one of the two had to die and a prayer that they would again get to celebrate with the boy who lived. Only one had to die and they had their hopes for the younger of the two to live through it.

"Harry… tomorrow seems to be coming closer. Don't you think you should rest before the battle?"

Harry only looked at the one who asked him the question, and a small smile went onto his face. He may be in his final year at Hogwarts but it was obvious that he was still considered the young boy from his first year. That boy that did not know a thing about magic, or his history. However now?...

Shaking his head, he looked at Lupin. "I'll be fine… I have enough energy to fight even if I don't sleep one night. Besides, I want to talk with everyone. I may never get to see some of them again Lupin, and knowing that makes me want to delay tomorrow as much as I possibly can."

Lupin looked at Harry for a long time. It seemed while he wasn't looking Harry had grown up to be a strong man. A smile graced his tiered face as he looked at his best friend's son and his old lover's godson. Yes, they would be proud of him right now.

Beaming with pride, he nodded and moved to talk with Snape who would be leading Voldemort to them tomorrow for their attack.

Harry watched as Lupin walked away. He was worried about the battle, though he would never tell anyone. He moved to the place of the party he had been trying to avoid all night. He had to talk to them just in case he really didn't come back.

As he neared them, he found himself looking at his oldest friends, his first friends. They were talking in hushed voices. Ron was leaning close to Hermione as she talked hurriedly, as if, if she didn't say it now it would never come. Tears were coming from her eyes and Ron had the posture as if he was ready to join her tears with his own.

Heaving a breath, he neared them closer with stealth. They did not know he had come to them until he placed a hand on their shoulders. Hermione fell into his chest, a sob that hurt Harry deeper then any spell he had been hit with before coming from her. He put on hand on her back reassuringly and his gaze locked with Ron. They stood there, two old friends that had been through everything together just looking at one another. Ron gave a weak smile and looked to Hermione.

"Come on Herm… I'm sure we're not making it any easier on Harry then it is. He'll come back and you're just going to feel stupid for crying like this." Ron teased her, trying to be reassuring at the same time.

"I'm not going to feel stupid for worrying about him!" Hermione yelled back at Ron hugging into Harry's chest more, her words now becoming hard to understand.

"You'll make him feel guilty Hermione… if he has to worry about how much you cried… How much—" his words caught in his throat.

Harry looked at him. Ron's eyes seemed to have glazed over and he was fighting tears begging to be shed. "I'll be back… I promise, I'll come back."

Ron looked at Harry a little longer before he raised his hand to shake Harry's. As they shook hands, Ron nodded to Harry. "We'll be waiting then mate." And he took Hermione to their shared room.

It felt as if he used all his strength not to cry himself. He knew if he cried, if he showed one moment of doubt to them, they would never have gone to bed. Now however, he was tiered and he had barely even finished talking with the others.

Moving to a place that was out of the way, he sat down. His head leaned back and his hand covered his eyes. He needed to go upstairs to rest a bit. Deciding on what to do he stood up again and headed for the door, not noticing he was being followed.

In his room he fell onto his matters, his face burying itself in his pillow. His eyes closed for a moment as he thought about what will be coming, who he will be fighting, and how many he was going to have to get out of the way before he reached Voldemort.

So lost in his thoughts was he that he had not noticed his door opening, closing and locking behind him. His hands at his sides he began to drift to a sleep that was well waited for. Suddenly he felt someone stratled him. His eyes flew open and he began to free himself. His arms had been pinned to his sides by the legs that were wrapped around him from behind. He cursed his ability to feel the intruder and wondered what was going to happen.

The weight leaned forward on him and he whispered in his ear. "Potter you move too much."

Harry stopped struggling in an instant. He knew who it was and knew he was in no immediate danger other then not getting any sleep tonight. "Malfoy get off of me." He said pushing up a little

"Why should I?" he pouted, beginning to wiggle a little.

"Because I can't breath. " Harry said back now preparing to roll over.

"And the problem?" Draco teased, nibbling Harry's ear.

"We won't have fun tonight if I suffocate." And with that he used his strength and rolled over, toppling Draco off the bed.

"You're no fun Potter." Draco whined again as he rubbed his butt. "And that hurt you know."

"Then you should have listened…." Harry looked at Draco as he continued to rub his ass. "Why are you here or are there no Orders and this is a pleasure visit?"

Draco stopped after the question was asked. He looked at Harry with a sorrowful look. "I was sent here to assassinate you… the dark lord isn't pleased with all my failures so he sent me on a mission he knew I'd fail." Draco sat down beside Harry, "My father agreed to send me solo for this mission so now I am expected to be dead now. I guess I really fucked up huh?"

Harry placed an arm around Draco's shaking shoulders. "You aren't going to be going back are you?" Harry whispered into Draco's ears.

"I spoke with Dumbledore this evening. He agreed I should lay low until after the battle… I want to fight with you though and asked Dumbledore… he agreed to it after persuading him for a while."

Harry smiled for a moment then it faded, "I don't want you to fight Draco." Was Harry's short answer.

"You can't stop me! I'm going with you to battle them. Do you think I want them to win, and if I can help-"

Harry cut his words short as his lips took hold of Draco's in a passionate kiss. Pulling back Harry locked eyes with Draco. "I don't want to lose you…"

As Draco was about to become angry and fight back he saw it. He saw the tears of the great Harry Potter. It was a sight that would kill him in a slow and painful death if he continued to cry. It hurt him so badly that he felt himself beginning to cry.

"You can't lose me Harry, love… I am never going to leave you." And he took Harry and leaned him forward, licking the tears from his cheeks.

Harry grabbed Draco's wrist and held it on his face. Closing his eyes, he leaned into it. "Love I missed you." He whispered. "These nights have been far to cold."

A smirk came to Draco's face. "Then tonight shall be a warm one." He said as he kissed Harry again.

Biting his bottom lip he heard Harry moan and open his mouth to Draco. Draco, never missing an opportunity, slipped his tongue into his mouth. They fought for supremacy in Harry's mouth and Harry pushed Draco's tongue back to his own mouth and he traced every corned of Draco's mouth. He wanted to remember it for the rest of his life.

Leaning Draco back, he broke the kiss and looked into his eyes. His eyes had become glazed with a lust and were half lidded as he looked at Harry. Harry traced his hands down Draco's sides making him gasp for air as he hit a sensitive spot. Harry bent down and nibbled on Draco's neck making one of his legs twitch.

"Love…We can't…you have to go into battle tomorrow and I'm coming with you… we can wait until after." Draco said in a ragged breath.

"Not long after Draco." Harry mumbled into his neck and collapsed on top of him.

Draco put his arms around him, pulled him closer, and nuzzled his head where Harry's shoulder and neck meet. "I like this." He said with out realizing he said it.

Harry smiled at the comment. "I like this too Draco." He said and rolled so he and Draco were on their sides. "I don't ever want this to end Draco."

Smiling Draco kissed Harry's neck. "I don't think any one wants this silent peace to end Harry." With that he dozed off, leaving Harry to the waking world.

It had been only a few hours before he disentangled himself from Draco. Truthfully he was amazed at how much Draco could sleep through. He stood from the bed and walked to the desk that was in the room. On it was parchment, ink, quills, and many documents that concerned things he would look at after the battle. Lighting a candle on the desk side he pulled parchment to him and a quill. He had to leave this just in case he didn't make it back. He had a feeling that he wasn't going to make it back but he'd be damn if he let Voldemort go free. No this fight was going to end everything. He hoped it would spare Draco from death though.

Readying the quill he wrote the note that he would never see again. It read:

_Dear Draco, _

_I know if you found this then the battle, this war, has finally ended. Yet I don't know what happened, I pray that our side won. Draco I am sure you hate me for this but I am sure that before this fight is over, I will be dead. Maybe it will end because I beat Voldemort huh? That would be my gift to you. I was really looking forward to this year with you. That this Christmas I could finally have it with someone that I love so dearly, as I love you. I think that was my greatest dream. That was the dream I have always had. When I was younger it was a dream to be with family, as a teenager it was to be with some one I'm dating, but now, as a grown man, my wish was to spend the holidays with my future. Guess what Draco; you are all of those things to me. Yet I don't know what I am to you, I hope my death saved you from a life of misery. _

_Draco those days we spent together at the school, during holidays, and those nights. Those Draco, have been and will always be precious to me. Every time I look at you I can feel myself submitting to you. When we were younger I think that's why I always fought with you. I didn't want to submit to you, and when I felt myself begging for you to let me submit I hated myself. I was always jealous of you. You had what I wanted most of all, even if it's not perfect; it is something I would do anything for. It was family Draco. I considered those that are close to me family now and I no longer yearn for it the way I used to. Draco I felt as if I had been lost before I finally understood that I loved you. That night you found me I was going to kill myself. You pulled me back. So for that I thank you because you pulled me back and made me happy. For that I thank you._

_Before I stop and join you in bed tonight Draco I want you to understand what I am going to do is for your own good. The truth is that I love you to much to watch you fight if I can stop it from happening... I need you to comfort Ron and Hermione. They will probably never forgive me for doing this. You may not either but I want you three to live happily. And the whole reason I am even caring I win this battle against Voldemort is because I want you three to live a free life and not have to look to your shadows expecting an attack. I sacrifice my self for this world and for you. I will let my body die if that could save the people from fear. I would do it in an instant. Maybe Ron was right when he said I act like a thick headed hero. I'm sorry for the pain, if any, my passing will cause you. Remember our promise Draco.When this war is over we will finally be able to find a peaceful home were we won't need to fight for our happiness because we will create It ourselves, with every step to the future we take together as one. I will always be a part of you Draco, as long as you need me I will be there. So Draco, no matter what happens please live to see this future we build, you build._

_Your love always and forever,_

_Harry Potter _

Folding the letter he placed it in an envelope. The envelope was then sealed and the name Draco was written on the front of it. He placed it in the drawer to his left hoping Draco would find it after the battle. Looking back at Draco he smiled. Draco truly was beautiful when he slept, though he seemed to be waking up.

Standing Harry walked over to him and sat on the bed. Draco's eyes slowly opened then became panicked when he didn't see Harry. Jumping up he looked around before he noticed that Harry was behind him. Turning he grabbed Harry and started to mumble things Harry could barely make out. What he did catch was, "gone…dream…died…lost…dark"

Harry gently rocked him and kissed him on the forehead. "Draco, I'm right here. I'm not going to leave you…"

After a while Draco finally calmed down. "Promise me." He said looking Harry in the eye.

"…Draco you know I can't. Neither of us can see the future and what it will bring. All we can do is live in the here and now…but I do promise when this war is over we will finally be able to find a peaceful home were we won't need to fight for our happiness because we will create It ourselves, with every step to the future we take together as one. That's all I can promise you."

Draco cried and put his head on Harry's chest. "Together right?"

"Always and forever Draco." Harry whispered into Draco's ear.

Draco nodded and then lifted his head. "How much longer?"

"I think in a few hours…two or three maybe." Harry said looking at his watch.

Draco put his hand on Harry's watch and looked him in the eye. "You need rest, love. You've not slept since yesterday and then it was only an hour."

Nodding Harry laid down beside Draco. Closing his eyes, he tried not to think about the upcoming battle. Right now, he was with Draco, safely in their bed.

--- / --- / ---

The battle field seemed ready for them that morning, and the animals had all stopped moving, quieted down, and seemed to run away. Snape had already gone to Voldemort. If all went as planed they all would be apperating any moment now.

Harry glanced over to his side and looked at the quickly pailing Draco. He had told him to stay, not to follow him, but he had insisted. Ron and Hermione also insisted, if they could not go into the battle at least Draco would go. Realizing now how unfair it was to have three on one; especially if one was like Mrs. Weasley.

Draco continued to gaze on. He was beyond scared, beyond terrified, and he actually felt an emotion that he had never felt before, and there was no name for it. He looked over at Harry and realized that he had no fear on his face. This was his destiny and it was apparent now that he was no longer fighting against it.

"Stay here for a moment Draco, and stay quiet." Harry barked to Draco and moved back to speak with three men a ways away from him.

He turned back to the front and watched. His warnings suddenly screamed to watch out, but he turned too late. The spell hit him square in the chest. His body froze and he fell over. He was confused, who had hit him with a freezing spell and why wasn't anyone reversing it…

Then it hit him… Harry.

His eyes sought him out with what little vision he had now that his head didn't move. Harry had come into his vision quickly and levitated him. He moved as fast as he could, since they were now hearing deatheaters apperate onto the field.

Harry gently placed him into a thick forest and the man Draco was just realizing was there pulled out an invisibility cloak from his pocket. Draco's eyes were pleading. Not only would he not be able to fight, in this area he would get a full vision of the final battle, he would get to watch those he knew die. He might even be forced to watch Harry die…

Harry's mind was racing. He had to hurry. Snape could only delay them for so long. Quickly putting the invisibility cloak on him he whispered what apology he could and apperated onto the field as planned.

As hours paced the fight still went on and Draco kept fighting the spell on him. Harry was making sure the spell wouldn't relinquish its hold on him. A stray petrifaction spell always found its way into the woods to land on him.

Then it happened, Harry and Voldemort meet on the field…

It seemed as if all fighting froze as they began the final fight, the final battle, and the end of the war one way or another.

Spells were used so quickly, counter-curses came as if automatically, and there was no more deatheaters, no more Order, there were only the two. They seemed as if they were wizards of old the way they were fighting, as if there were no bounds to what they were doing, as if they had transcended the boundaries of all magic and bonded had with it some how. They were light and dark.

Then it ended, a large explosion, both disappeared in the smoke. All breaths were held as it cleared. Both held no wand and stood proud. The end had come and both fell. Voldemort fell first, death finally took the elusive one greedily. A cheer rose from the Order and horrified screams from the deatheaters. Draco smiled at a job well done, then his eyes opened wider in horror.

Harry Potter, the boy who lived, the boy of prophecy, fell to his knees. His lips moved as if saying something as his eyes glazed over when death took hold, and he fell like Voldemort.

The war was over…

The deatheaters imprisoned…

Voldemort was finally dead…

The world was safe and a farewell letter was found…

But the most precious thing of all had to be lost for this peace…

Harry Potter was now dead.

**: . : THE END : . : **

**A/N: **wOOt I finished the first part…or rather I've finally submitted the first part. Oooooo I luv this one sooo much. Angst goodness my friends, angst goodness. So how'd it go? As good as my second part, that, like an idiot, I posted and then lost my first part to it and it has been alone while I've searched for it this one. I found it finally, and I swear I did not know that shelves could hide things so well cause I've found some more of my fanfictions I'd forgotten I'd even written, lol... Well technically these two are dif. stories, but they are based on the same plot, a before and after shot basically. Hmmm, I wonder how it is, feed back much appreciated. Well now that I've found this and got it up I can finally finish my other Harry Potter story, Longing to be Found. It's dark, and for mature readers, but if you get past the first chapter it'll be good. I've decided to tone it down a bit seeing as how not many people review it and maybe it scares them away.

Please Review! Please Review! Please Review!

Thank you!

from your lovable writter TwilightKitsune1.


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